No Fate But What We Make, or “No Copyright Infringement Intended.”

I read a post on datingish asking if fate was real because some dude noticed his girlfriend and him had contact on the same dates as two people in a movie (I think it was called “the boathouse”, though I’ve never seen it).

My response:

Right now you may be breathing in an atom of oxygen that exactly one year ago was on the exact opposite side of the planet.

But you’d never notice.  And if you did you probably wouldn’t care because it’s not sexy.

Coincidences are extremely likely to occur all the time, and occur more frequently with people because we create more variables, like systems of times, dates, other units of measurements, traditions, names, astrological signs and blah blah blah.  And they’re more noticeable with people because we care about these things.  We think marriages and deaths and birthdays are much more important than a well timed atom floating around the planet.

And we act surprised when these things coincide like it means something special.

Let me ask you, what exactly do you suppose happened?  The universe conspired to make you meet someone on dates in the calendar that non-existent people in a different year in a fictional universe met?  Or maybe that the universe made that writer write down those dates?

Or what, god did it?

The only kind of fate that exists is causality.  Shit happens for a reason, but not necessarily a good reason.  Good things happen for the same reason bad things happen, the same universal force of gravitation that keeps your car on the road so you don’t crash into a tree and kill yourself is going to make someone slip, crack their head on their bathroom floor and end up paralyzed for life.

Maybe the only meaning in that is the fact that one of those thing cannot happen without the other.  Or more accurately, one cannot be possible without the other also being possible.

But to ask if two things coinciding is a coincidence is just silly.


About agnophilo

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16 Responses to No Fate But What We Make, or “No Copyright Infringement Intended.”

  1. It was The Lake House.  One of my favorites, and I generally don’t say that about chick flicks.But to say that it was fate that they met on the same day as fictional people is just silly.  I guess it’s cute to think so, but it just makes one seem like an over-infatuated moron with nothing better to do than use pop culture references to give meaning to their relationship.

  2. ginseng says:

    its no conicidence, i am in los angeles. and i am fuckin psychic, and i do sing fuckin billie jean on the boardwalk for FREE and i do tai chi everywhere i fuckin go, yeah. peace

  3. agnophilo says:

    @the_rocking_of_socks – Couldn’t agree more.  It’s a cute idea, but not a valid one.Reality usually isn’t sexy, but it’s got more weight.I don’t like to bullshit people, even if someone cooks something and asks how does it taste I give them an honest answer.  It’s not sexy, but when I gush over something they made that’s delicious they know I’m not just blowing smoke up their ass.It has more weight.

  4. striemmy says:

    Actually it’s the same part of the brain that recognizes the significance of systems and patterns that is the push behind all science that fuels that sort of thinking. Is this really the result of you having seen special significance in patterns at one point in your life and suffering a trauma as the result of it? These things generally are.

  5. striemmy says:

    @agnophilo – The difference between weight and tact is that one thing will drive people off and the other maintains friendships and business relationships. 

  6. Losertastic says:

    haha, that’s actually really silly.i completely agree with you.

  7. agnophilo says:

    @striemmy – No.@striemmy – So you’re advocating bullshit over honesty?

  8. agnophilo says:

    @striemmy – And you can be tactful and honest, it’s called not being an asshole.

  9. agnophilo says:

    @Losertastic – Nice to hear as always.

  10. @agnophilo –  Hey now, I think reality is sexy – or at least people who can think rationally and critically. Although respect plays a role too.

  11. agnophilo says:

    @Ex_Adyto_Cordis – Well I meant sexy more figuratively, but that is true also : )

  12. @agnophilo – Oh, haha. Maybe I’m just turned on by concepts.

  13. agnophilo says:

    @Ex_Adyto_Cordis – : )  That’s okay too.

  14. asrial86 says:

    Rofl, people are so transparent, reaching for anything possible.

  15. striemmy says:

    @agnophilo – Lol if a person has tact then there is a veritable cornucopia of situations in which honesty is simply not the best policy, even when it is asked for. There is no more of a need to feed someone bullshit than there is to be honest with them. Keep in mind that when you’re honest with someone, when you feel like you’re pulling no punches and telling things the way that they are, you are only telling them things the way that you see them. Will it be rewarding if they ever should get praise from you? Sure.. If they ever get praise from you. If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all, as it were. Honesty, like bullshit, is a tool. When it is useful, generally during the course of befriending someone or disabling an opponent, it is very useful. When it is not, like when a female friend asks you whether you think all of her relationship problems for the past decade have been her fault, it’s really not.

  16. agnophilo says:

    @haloed – Yup.@striemmy – I grasp the concept of a white lie.

Speak yer mind.

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