Astrology Is Real (Well, Sort Of).

Astrology is the idea that heavenly bodies hold sway over our lives, moods, actions, fate etc.  This idea is actually true in two senses that I can think of.

One, the moon’s gravity regulates women’s menstrual cycle (and effects the tides, but hey we’re not horseshoe crabs so it doesn’t matter).  And two, the “alignment” of the planet and the sun effects the weather which also causes SAD, seasonal affective disorder.

I was thinking about this the other day, and thought wouldn’t it be cool if like a hundred years from now astrology was a legitimate field of science, like they found out more stuff that was actually effected by the planets etc.

I mean I doubt it, but it would be cool.

But yeah, the astrological “forecasts” you get in the newspaper are total bullshit.  The idea that being born X month means Y thing(s) is/are going to happen to you is easily refutable by the fact that the same thing doesn’t happen to 1 in 12 people, ever.  Unless it’s extremely routine and then you don’t need someone to tell you it will happen.

Your horoscope will never read:

“You will be arrested for pedophilia.  Your uncle will be diagnosed with cancer this week, but it will be benign.  And your balls will drop off.  Oh and your house will burn down.”

If they did write that we’d clue in and see that when 1/12th of americans aren’t arrested for kid-fucking and the fire department isn’t swamped with pedophile houses burning down and everyone’s uncle doesn’t have benign cancer, that it’s complete bullshit.

But I mean really, we should all be able to figure it out anyway.

But the moon thing is real.


About agnophilo

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22 Responses to Astrology Is Real (Well, Sort Of).

  1. gene546 says:

    I agreed with you. Your argument has no contradictions.

  2. SirNickDon says:

    You know what would be fascinating?  An essay or even a short book that collects statements from the people who write or work with newspaper/magazine horoscopes.  It’d be interesting to see the various ways they perceive what they’re doing, and the kind of feedback they receive from readers.  

  3. gene546 says:

    I knew since the beginning of our post that you’re not superstitious at all. Our differences are over evolution and creation.

  4. agnophilo says:

    @SirNickDon – Would be difficult to get honest answers I suspect.  For many reasons.@gene546 – Still lost as to what you mean.

  5. gene546 says:

    @agnophilo – Superstitious, is this the word that you don’t understand? Or are our differences about Religion vs. Evolution?

  6. wtf_turmoill says:

    “the moon’s gravity regulates women’s menstrual cycle”Wait, really? Huh? I did not know that. @_@

  7. misuriver says:

    Well then the moon is retarded, because my menstrual cycle is anything but regulated.

  8. misuriver says:

    @agnophilo – Ignore Gene4whatever. He picks fights with every Atheist/Agnostic over evolution. 

  9. jenessa1889 says:

    “the moon’s gravity regulates women’s menstrual cycle”Is that really true?   On the face of it that makes little sense because (even if you eliminate those women on birth control because we’re being artificially regulated) it’s not as though all women menstruate in the same week of the month, so it’s not like a full moon causes your period.   And it’s not a 4 week cycle for all women, but even if it was, the fact that a women’s cycle is 4 weeks long and so is a cycle of the moon doesn’t mean that the moon actually exerts a relevant gravitational pull on my uterus.   I really doubt that women’s cycles would go haywire if the moon got destroyed.   Also, what would be the evolutionary purpose of syncing your menstrual cycle with moon cycles?   It just makes no sense to me

  10. I’m going to be really forward and say:I you.  Yes. 

  11. jenessa1889 says:

    @SirNickDon – most of the people hired to do that are not actually trained astrologists (whatever he hell that would mean), they’re usually psychologists.   they purposely write vague, cryptic predictions which could easily be interpreted in multiple ways, so that they could fit almost anyone.   I forget the term for it in psychology but there’s this concept that if you write vague, positive personality descriptions, almost everyone will agree that it accurately describes them.   This can easily be taken advantage of when writing any predictionCool experiment stolen from Bill Nye: cut the horoscopes out of the newspaper and glue them on index cards, with the sign they supposedly describe on the back (obv cut off the part from the paper that says which sign it is), then have people who believe that crap try to figure out which one is their horoscope.

  12. @jenessa1889 – This article is fairly convincing. It suggests that the length of the human female’s menstrual cycle is merely a coincidence.If all women menstruated in sync, that would be nature’s cruelest joke. XD

  13. slinky says:

    The best on line is These guys are Swiss and if you can figure out how to use the page it’s the best there is for free.or to purchase.  Another place to start is Susan is excellent and goes into detail about each sign each and every month..another freebie or you can pay. (still generalized unless you pay and get your own chart done.. It’s a lot different than you can imagine. astrocafe is probably easier for the beginner.

  14. agnophilo says:

    @gene546 – The second one.  I don’t see what it has to do with this blog.@wtf_turmoill – Why do you think it happens once a month or so?@misuriver – It happens.@jenessa1889 – Why would it have to be at a full moon?  @johnny_hopkins – : )@jenessa1889 – The term for it in confidence work is cold reading.@stephenandginny – Yeah, husbands would go into hiding in sync.  But yeah, I could be wrong.  Probably am.  Oh well.@Unstoppable_Inner_Strength – Too lazy/tired to read this at nearly 2am.  Might try tomorrow.@slinky – No.

  15. @agnophilo – your playlist gets me every single time.

  16. YouToMe says:

    Haha. Cracker :)I agree about horoscopes. And agree that there may be something to gravitational pull/moon/astrological forces. Im not sure if it is related to hormones or pull or both, but women in same dwelling seem to have cycles regulated somehow over a period of time. Ive felt oddly different with phases of moon. There should be some more research done.

  17. wtf_turmoill says:

    @agnophilo – Err, I don’t really know, haha. I never thought it would be that, though, seeing as it’s comes at a different time from person to person. This isn’t your standard biology lesson. I just thought that a month was how long it took for all that fun shit to happen before… yeah.

  18. jenessa1889 says:

    @agnophilo – lol idk, why not?  haha  

  19. gene546 says:

    Forget about it, ok.

  20. Orlando says:

    Are you still a student???   Please pay more attention in school!!The woman’s mensuration cycle has nothing to do with  the moon, except some women notice that they do follow a lunar cycle too… but the human mensuration cycle is all related to human biology and is not “regulated” by anything other than hormones and bio-neural chemicals.The science of ASTRONOMY is already a science and the orbits of the moon does have a gravitational effect on the earth.If you study history far back,  you will be surprised to see that the story of Jesus Christ himself can be seen to have been created as an allegory to the sun rising in the eastern horizon in the sign of Virgo the Virgin,  and that the time of Christ was the “Age” of Pisces and the time before him,  the time of Moses was the ending of the time where the bull or ram was worshiped which symbolized Aries or Taurus.This is where astrology comes from,  and it has already been scientifically proven that people’s lives are not governed by astrological symbolism in any form other than psychologically,  so basically,  all of astrology has no basis in scientific fact.Astronomy on the other hand,  the science of the stars and planets, is all factual.the NASA website and NOVA on PBS are great places for astronomy.there’s plenty of crap about astrology out there but I can’t think of anything scholarly or academic to recommend…You could google “the moon” and actually find some really factual scientific stuff,  just make sure you check your sources,  try to find academic or governmental sources.If you read something on Wikipedia, always check the source at the bottom.Good Luck

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